Saturday, March 04, 2006


I have been having visitors recently that I want to address. It started with a search someone did. Now, however, there are two searches showing up. The first did not show my site, and I could not figure out how it happened that I was visited. The later one does, and refers to another visitor that I had had who took one of my posts to a website that included information on how to come here. I addressed that incident here, which is the post that now shows up on the second search results.

I will not allow what happened to other blogs and groups happen here. This site is not open to hatred, bitterness, and name-calling. I have access to ISP numbers, and will post them, as well as cities of origin if I need to.

Now, some from today are here because I told them about what had been happening. So I am not speaking of them, though they are welcome to just leave a note saying that they are friendly visitors if they would like.

I am not going to allow this and this to happen here (read comments sections).

I am an Open Records Supporter. I am also a supporter of reunions of adult adoptees. I am a proud member of the Adoption Triad. I am the one who did the search for our daughters' birthparents when they wanted to search, and paid the small costs involved.

I wrote to both birthmothers to thank them for giving the girls LIFE. They could have chosen differently. Our second daughter's birthmother, in fact, chose LIFE AND ADOPTION twice. We have been 'in reunion' with her bhalf sister since she was placed with another family three years later.

Like it or not, I am Mom. Period.

I did not baby sit for 30 years. I parented.

You cannot depersonalize me because I will not allow you to. You cannot diminish the role in my three children's and four grandchildren's lives because I will not allow you to. You cannot come here and attempt to use this as your forum of hatred because I will not allow you to.

Should I get these kinds of emails or comments, I will decide if they come onto my site or not, and I may PUBLISH some if I choose to do so. But not for your purpose. Simply as illustrations of hatred, unforgiveness, bigotry. With ISP addresses, so that you are forewarned.

When a label describing this Mom is used, it is descriptive, as in an adjective. Smart Mom. Stubborn Mom. Strict Mom. Loving Mom. Short Mom. Adoptive Mom.

I am NOT a noun. Mom is my title. 'Adopter' is not. 'Adopter' is a Pejorative.

A word or phrase is a pejorative (frequently misspelled perjorative) if it implies contempt or disapproval.

The adjective pejorative is synonymous with derogatory and dyslogistic (noun: dyslogism) (antonyms: meliorative, eulogistic, noun eulogism). Dyslogisms such as "pea-brain" and "bottom-feeder" are words and phrases essentially pejorative by their nature.

I also had at one time, an infertility problem. But I was not a 'Desperate Infertile", again, a Pejorative.

I learned long ago that for my mental health, I MUST (not just 'recommended', but MUST) accept responsibility for my own actions, and I MUST forgive. Without those two components active in my life, I grow more bitter, angry, blaming and get sicker and sicker.

Those who choose to hold onto unforgiveness, blaming only get sicker. It destroys them.

Those who dislike the current adoption System have been working together for a long time. We are three parts of the whole. Adoptive Parent, Birth Parent and Adoptee. Two had CHOICES when this relationship began. ONE did not have any choice at all.

For one party of the arrangement to say that they had NO responsibility for their choice is false. To blame Social Workers, Adoptive Parents, etc for their own actions is also, ridiculous.

Yes, there was a day when birthmothers were sent to unwed mother's homes by their parents and told not to return home with the baby. Some still kept. Most could not do so. I have had empathy for these women for years, because they were MY GENERATION and before.

But that was not the fault of any Adoptive Parent. That was their OWN PARENTS demanding that they leave, enter the unwed mother's home, (or an Aunt's home somewhere out of the area...etc) and told them that if they came home with that... baby, they had no home. When the girls came home sans baby, they also were NOT allowed to talk about it again in most cases.

That was the home of origin. And it may still happen in some homes today. However, today, there are helps available, and there are MANY who choose to keep and raise their children. Some should not, but do. And some CHOOSE Adoption for their child as did Karen and Liz (twice).

So, keep your sick hatred and blaming away from me, as I will have no part of it. I learned long ago that feelings are able to be changed by choice. Choosing to Let Go and Let God, One Day at a Time. Choosing to forgive, though that does not imply approval. Choosing to be part of accomplishing Good by uniting with others to fight what is wrong, not fighting people and blaming. Principles over Personalities is the way the 12 Step Programs talk about this.

I am at peace.

My girls have two mothers. One of them is responsive and has come full circle. The other has been unresponsive and has left my daughter wondering why she has not even sent a medical history for her two daughters.

The one in reunion now also has six half siblings, complete with something I had always dreamt about having, OLDER BROTHERS.

So, again, keep your hatred and animosity and pejorative statements in your own circle of poison, because it is not welcome here. Note that there is no 'please' involved in that statement.

To the Adoption Triad Community. I will continue to fight for Open Records, and my adult adoptee friends to have access to updated MEDICAL HISTORIES and to their roots for as long as I am breathing. And then, from Heaven when He lets me in.

To my many friends who are Birthmothers, Birthfathers, Birth Siblings and Extended families, Adoptees, and other Adoptive Mothers, Fathers, Sibs, Extended Families... You are welcome in my Life anytime. And I will stand with you, forever.

One of the little books from Hazelden is called "Stools and Bottles". They describe the first Four Steps of the Program as a three legged Stool. Remove ONE LEG from that stool, and it is no longer stable, no longer of any use. It will fall.

Trying to pretend that the Adoptive Mother/Father/Family is not real, and is not involved in a healthy way as part of the Adoption Triad by removing that 'leg' will not heal anything.

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Michael Ellis

From Stephen Baskerville:

Michael Ellis was one of the giants of the struggle for children, fathers, and families. He worked tirelessly for many years and helped many fathers and children, whose lives are better for what he did. Mike also had the respect and admiration of many people in the fathers' movement for his work and selflessness.
Mike died yesterday, March 3, near his home in Wisconsin following surgery for a brain tumor. He was 52. Mike is survived by his mother and by his two children, Stephanie, 15, and James, 14. Mike and his children had not been permitted to see one another for more than a decade. The family does not know where the children live. These children will never realize how much they were loved by the father they barely knew, nor how torn apart he was by their loss.
The funeral will be Monday, March 6 at 1:00 pm at the Christian Missionary Church Alliance, 502 21st Street, North Menomonie, Wisconsin.
Cards and communications to his family can be sent to the Ellis family at:
Box 263
Elmwood, Wisconsin 54740-0001
This message is cc'd to his address, and his family will get any replies.
Stephen Baskerville


3-March-2006 -- Catholic News Agency


BOSTON, March 2 (CNA) - Bishops of the Archdiocese of Boston, who for years have been all but powerless in controlling of the local branch of Catholic Charities, may finally regain their practical authority over the controversial Massachusetts organization. Earlier today, seven board members opted to resign their posts.

The dissenting board members decided to resign due to disagreement with the Massachusetts Roman Catholic bishops' request that Catholic social service agencies be exempted from a law requiring them to place adoptive children with homosexual couples.

The seven board members issued a statement saying that they were "deeply troubled" by the bishops' request, adding that it "undermines our moral priority of helping vulnerable children find loving homes.”

The statement also said that the members could not “participate in an effort to pursue legal permission to discriminate against Massachusetts citizens who want to play a part in building strong families."

"The course the Bishops have charted”, they added, “threatens the very essence of our Christian mission. For the sake of the poor we serve, we pray they will reconsider."

The 7 resigning board members are Geri Denterlein, president of Denterlein Worldwide Public Affairs and a supporter if homosexual “marriage”; Donna Gittens, chief executive officer of Causemedia; Paul LaCamera, general manager of the WBUR radio group; Brian Leary, partner of Gadsby Hannah; Peter Meade, executive vice president of Blue Cross Blue Shield of Massachusetts; Colette Phillips, president and CEO of Colette Phillips Communications and Micho Spring, chairman of Weber Shandwick New England.

On Tuesday, the state's four bishops said that state law compromised their religious freedom by requiring them to consider gays as acceptable adoptive parents.

"Because of the Church's teaching,” they said, “Catholic agencies may not provide adoptions to same sex couples. Hence we intend to seek relief from the regulatory requirements of the Commonwealth on this issue."

Since 1985, Catholic Charities has placed 13 children in same-sex households. In fact, the process started even before same sex unions were legal in the state.

Fr. J. Bryan Hehir, Catholic Charities’ president, released a statement saying that the organization was "saddened" that the board members felt compelled to step down.

Edward Saunders of the Massachusetts Catholic Conference said he had no comment on the resignations.

The resignation of the seven board members marks the latest and perhaps most volatile chapter in the stand-off between the state’s bishops and Catholic Charities.

Last year, Cardinal-designate Sean O’Malley explicitly asked Catholic Charity’s board to stop allowing homosexual couples to adopt through the agency.

In response, the 42-member board voted unanimously to continue the practice.

In light of today’s resignations, the remaining board members will have to make a decision: whether they will collectively resign their own posts or abide by the bishops’ new rules.

Click here to share this news story with a friend.

Filmmaker Wraps 'Schiavo' Movie in 2 Hrs 14 Min

From Cheryl Ford, RN:

Unbelievable! What's Next????

Filmmaker Wraps 'Schiavo' Movie in 2 Hrs 14 Min
By Madhu Soman, Reuters

NEW DELHI (March 2) - An Indian film maker has attempted a world record by finishing a 74-minute feature, loosely based on Terri Schiavo's protracted right-to-die battle that gripped the United States in 2005, in 2 hours and 14 minutes.

Engineer-turned-director Jayaraj's "Atbhutam" (Wonder) tries to capture the drama of mercy-killing in the last hour-and-a-half in the life of a US-based Indian-born playwright suffering from pancreatic cancer.

"I felt the power. When we started at 11.46 a.m., the whole crew was in a trance ... a kind of invisible energy, and we were just flying one from one sequence to the other," 45-year-old Jayaraj told Reuters by phone from the city of Hyderabad.

"And just before the last shot, when my associate said 'one shot left', that's when I realized my dream is finally going to come true."

The record-breaking attempt has been forwarded to the Guinness Book of World Records with authentication letters from Ramanaidu, himself listed as the most prolific producer with 110 films, and an official from the Andhra Pradesh state government, who were present for filming.

Jayaraj opted for an Oregon hospital as his setting since the state's 1997 "Death with Dignity Act" made physician-assisted suicide legal.

Terri Schiavo, a Florida woman brain-damaged for 15 years, and her husband fought a protracted legal battle that gripped the United States before her feeding tube was removed in March, 2005.

Jayaraj approached studios in the United States and Britain five years ago with a story on mercy killing inspired by a euthanasia plea on behalf of an Indian chess player and muscular dystrophy patient by his mother who wanted to donate his organs.

"I originally wanted to make the movie in less than 10 hours. They all discouraged me since the producers couldn't imagine a movie getting completed in such a short time," said Jayaraj, who produced the movie, filmed in December, himself.

"Atbhutam" is scheduled for an end-March release.

The Schiavo saga reaffirmed the multiple award winning director's belief his was an idea whose time has come.

"The Schivao story where we had a husband supporting euthanasia and the patient's parents opposing it, inspired me to do the story again," he said.

"Atbhutam" portrays the dilemma of the playwright's attorney wife, who supports his wish to die, and his old parents who were unaware of such a thing until they meet him in the hospital.

Jayaraj, a veteran of 26 films including "Atbhutam," has won critical acclaim for his brand of experimental cinema.

He avoided multi-camera shoots for his world record attempt and instead used three separate cameras which he moved from one setting to the other.

"We'd planned things, including the lighting, in such minute details, that within a couple of minutes of canning one shot, the lighting for the next scene was switched on and the floor was made ready," said S. Kumar, the film's director of photography.


Before you decide to read Michael Schiavo's fabrications...


READ "Our Fight4Terri" and get the TRUTH!


Trafford Publishing: Our Fight4Terri

Cheryl Ford, RN ( is not affiliated with any other group and works to protect the rights of the disabled community

Fight4Terri does not wish to forward unsolicited mail.
Please type the word "unsubscribe" in subject heading if you prefer to not receive anymore updates about Terri and your screen name will be immediately deleted from Fight4Terri's address book.

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Friday, March 03, 2006

Catholic Dems assert "primacy of conscience" over Church teaching

As a Catholic, this news saddens me. Using 'primacy of conscience' as their excuse to thumb their noses at Catholic teaching, yet still call themselves 'Catholic' is a misuse of the term.

The true term is Pride. For now, after you read the news article, read this.
Also, more can be found here:

"A well-formed Christian conscience does not permit one to vote for a political program or an individual law that contradicts the fundamental contents of faith and morals"

Catechism of the Catholic Church 2272 Formal cooperation in an abortion constitutes a grave offense. The Church attaches the canonical penalty of excommunication to this crime against human life. "A person who procures a completed abortion incurs excommunication latae sententiae," "by the very commission of the offense," and subject to the conditions provided by Canon Law. The Church does not thereby intend to restrict the scope of mercy. Rather, she makes clear the gravity of the crime committed, the irreparable harm done to the innocent who is put to death, as well as to the parents and the whole of society.

The 55 of a total 72 Catholic Democrats in the House of Representatives who signed this need prayer.

The statement was issued from the office of Connecticut's Rep. Rosa DeLauro.
The others signing the statement were:
Joe Baca
Xavier Becerra
Robert Brady
Michael Capuano
Dennis A. Cardoza
Wm. Lacy Clay
Jim Costa
Joseph Crowley
Peter A. DeFazio
William Delahunt
Rosa DeLauro
Mike Doyle
Anna Eshoo
Lane Evans
Charles A. Gonzalez
Raul M. Grijalva
Luis V. Gutierrez
Maurice Hinchey
Tim Holden
Patrick J. Kennedy
Dale E. Kildee
James R. Langevin
John B. Larson
Stephen Lynch
Edward J. Markey
Jim Marshall
Carolyn McCarthy
Betty McCollum
James P. McGovern
Cynthia McKinney
Marty Meehan
Michael H. Michaud
George Miller
James P. Moran
Grace Napolitano
Richard E. Neal
James L. Oberstar
David R. Obey
Frank Pallone
Bill Pascrell
Ed Pastor
Nancy Pelosi
Silvestre Reyes
Lucille Roybal-Allard
Tim Ryan
John T. Salazar
Linda T. Sanchez
Loretta Sanchez
Jose Serrano
Hilda L. Solis
Bart Stupak
Gene Taylor
Mike Thompson
Nydia Velazquez
Diane Watson

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Thursday, March 02, 2006

Update on Prayers Needed for Deanna and Baby

On Feb 17th, I had received a prayer request from a friend about her pregnant DIL, with several updates on Feb 21 and 22. Subsequently, she left to go and be with her son and DIL, and has not been able to get in touch until tonight.

This is the updated information, with continued prayers being asked for DIL.

Again I ask for cont. prayers for Deanna and family.

The baby is doing very well but Deanna is still at high risk for stroke and hemorrhage--she has had 3 TIA's,blood clots, pneumonia and meningitis , resistance to antibiotics( MRSA)--staph aureus--very virulent---in isolation amd continued very severe headache with almost no sleep!

She has had 6 MRI's, 2 CAT scans, opening into the venticle of the brain, carotid sonogram, CVP line put in and removed with a PIC line put in, echo cardiogram, and tomorrow her 2nd sinus surgery- In spite of all this she is slowly improving, and yesterday got to see the baby although can't hold him.

All the specialists have never seen anything like this! Matthew is doing wonderfully however!--thank God!

Stephen's (Marti's son, Dad to Matthew) blood sugars have been over 500 and low--he has had almost no sleep either staying at the hospital with only a few hours at home since this started.

Please pray tomorrow that this will relieve her pain and headache and she will continue to heal! A Hematologist has been called in to see if she has a problem with her clotting mechanism
Deanna has not complained through any of this but she is really weak.--

Thanks again--in JMJ, Marti

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Ash Wednesday

Today is Ash Wednesday. The first Day of Lent. For Catholics, a day of Fasting and Abstinence. A day to begin to reflect on our relationship with Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

May we have a good Lent.

God bless!

"Remember, man, that thou art dust and unto dust thou shalt return."

Pregnant Woman Charged With Shooting Herself

Another sad, sad story. Another baby dead. A mother going to jail. Another family member aware of depression... yet stopping short of getting help. So sad. Pray for this family.

Even more sad... Virginia has a Safe Haven Law! She would not be prosecuted for taking her baby to a safe place and leaving her for others to care for.


You can leave your baby,

up to 14 days old,

with an employee

at any medical facility,

or police department

in Virginia.

Click Here to find a hospital in West Virginia.

The Safe Place for Newborns Telephone Crisis Line is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. If you would like to speak to someone about leaving your newborn baby with the program, call Toll Free:


For general information about the program, or to learn about how to publicize the safe abandonment law in your state, contact Safe Place for Newborns.

What happened to considering adoption? OPEN adoption is available in most places now. At least the child can live.

With EITHER of these options, it is very important that a good medical history accompany the baby for the child's sake later on.

We have the same kind of law in WI, but here, they only have three days, where in VA, it shows that they have up to 14 days...

Death is so final. Safe haven laws and adoption need to be options for people who cannot or choose not to raise their child for whatever reason.

Now, this woman's two other children will be without Mom as well.

How very sad.

Thanks to Alexa

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Nurse Raped for Refusing to Perform Abortions!

This is very nearly the ultimate sacrifice for following one's conscience! Some have had to give their lives at times, but this nurse was raped after she refused to perform illegal abortions.

The gang rape of a nurse who refused to perform illegal abortions has outraged Pakistan and intensified calls for the repeal of its rape laws.

"I was constantly put under pressure over the course of six months to carry out illegal abortions on two women but I refused," said Miss Kousar. "And so revenge was taken."

Miss Kousar's job at the clinic, set among neat squares of cotton and wheat fields bordering Pakistan's western tribal belt, pays her £35 a month. Abortion is illegal in Pakistan except when the mother's life is at risk.

"The family came and harassed me but I never imagined they would do this," she said, weeping and shaking with shock.

Sadly, under the law in Pakistan, she needs four witnesses to prove she is innocent! The three rapists deny the charges (of course!).


The victim can be considered a guilty party.

Thanks to Emily of After Abortion.

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Which Star Trek Character Are you?

ALSO from CatholicFire:

I have to admit I took this one twice. The first time, I put that I would be most comfortable in the sick bay (nurse/hygienist ya know) but REALLY wanted to sit in the Captain's Chair just to be able to sit down and work. (Nurses don't sit much, Hygienists sit a lot, I am currently doing more nursing....sigh)

So, the FIRST time, guess which character I was? You got it!

The Doctor
The Doctor. You'll always have a backup of

yourself and you can remember things for long

periods of time. But where does the food go

when you eat it?

Which Star Trek Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

And the second time, with only the chair changed:

Kathryn Janeway. All your friends and those around

you will be there at your side, just don't

get too far away from them or they'll think

you're in trouble.

Which Star Trek Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

OH, I did it once more and left out one different answer that I was also ambivalent on the first time through and got

Jean-Luc Picard. You command your ship with an

iron fist and the children love you. Bah!!!

Humbug!! KIDS!!! >_<

Which Star Trek Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

SOOOOOO, when you read all of them, and put them together.... you get one confused Star Trek character.... huh?


God bless!

I am a d20 (whatever that is...)

From CatholicFire came this quiz:

I am a d20

You are the large, round, friendly d20! (You probably didn't know this, but the shape of the twenty-sided die is called an Icosahedron.) You are the friendly, outgoing, outspoken, leader of friends. You are often looked up to, even though you don't normally deserve it. Most other types secretly wish they were you, and you'd give them tips on how, if only you had a clue yourself. Your charisma is often all you need, but you have your occasional moments of brilliance as well--just never when it's actually needed. You are the all-around good guy, a dependable chum, a respectable foe, and an inspiration to those who need one. Who says you can't get by on a smile and good looks alone?

I am a d20

Take the quiz at

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Fr. Frank Pavone Will Be At Steubenville April 16-17

Fr. Frank Pavone to Speak at Pro-Life Seminar

Posted on: Tuesday, February 22, 2005

On April 16 and 17, international pro-life leader Father Frank Pavone will bring his passion for the pro-life movement to Steubenville, where he will be a featured presenter at Franciscan University's two-day conference, "Catholic Moral Values and Public Policy."

Father Pavone will be joined by Dr. David Hess, chairman and professor of the Department of Neurology at the Medical College of Georgia; Liz Brown, licensed professional counselor; Chris Bell, founder and executive director of Good Counsel, an organization that provides homes for single mothers and babies; Joan Andrews Bell, pro-life activist; and Dr. Brian Scarnecchia, attorney and professor of legal studies at Franciscan University.

The conference team will give presentations on both the scientific and social aspects of the pro-life movement. Dr. Hess will explore stem cell research and human cloning, Brown will discuss the psychological effects of abortion, and Father Pavone will focus on public policy.

Father Pavone has been at the forefront of the public movement to reverse Roe. v. Wade for over 15 years. He is the director of Priests for Life and president of the National Pro-life Religious Council. His many TV and radio appearances include Catholic Family Radio, the Odyssey Network, Vatican Radio, and his series, Defending Life, on EWTN. He also makes regular trips to Capitol Hill, where his audiences have included the pro-life caucus of the House of Representatives.

The conference will be held from Saturday, April 16, at 9 a.m. to Sunday, April 17, at 10:30 a.m. on the Franciscan University campus. Registration for the full conference, which includes a eucharistic holy hour, lunch and evening banquet, and networking session, is $79. Registration for only Saturday's banquet and presentations by Father Pavone and Joan Andrews Bell is $40.

To register call 1-800-437-8368 or visit to download a registration form.

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Fr Frank Pavone Press Release Scheidler v NOW

Date: February 28, 2006
Contact Jerry Horn, 540-220-0095

Fr. Pavone Praises Supreme Court Victory for Pro-life Activists

Washington, D.C. – Priests for Life National Director Fr. Frank Pavone congratulated Joseph Scheidler and the Pro-life Action League for their victory at the Supreme Court, which ruled in the Scheidler vs. NOW case in favor of the pro-life activists.

“For decades, in this case and many others, pro-choice groups have tried to paint us who oppose abortion as violent people. Today, yet again, that strategy fails.”

Fr. Pavone urged pro-life citizens to be more active than ever. “The proper response to this ruling is to increase our peaceful, legal presence at killing centers everywhere, without fear of ridicule, false arrest, or persecution. Let’s follow Joe Scheidler’s example of persevering in protest of the greatest evil of our times, abortion. In particular, pastors should call their people to prayerful protest outside abortion killing centers, and should be there with them. The Supreme Court takes our First Amendment rights seriously; so should we.”

Priests for Life is the nation's largest Catholic pro-life organization dedicated to ending abortion and euthanasia. For more information, visit

Click here for further comments from Fr. Frank on this victory.

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NOW v. Scheidler-- US Supreme Court Unanimous 8-0

US Supreme Court rejects RICO case against pro-life activists
Feb. 28 (

Feb. 28 ( - The Supreme Court has ruled that pro-life demonstrations cannot be banned under a federal law intended to fight organized crime.

In a unanimous 8-0 decision announced on February 28, the Supreme Court apparently put an end to a 20-year case, NOW v. Scheidler, in which abortion advocates sought damages against prominent pro-life organizers, claiming that they were engaged in an illegal conspiracy to harm the abortion business.

The abortionists' lawsuit was brought under the federal RICO (Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations) law. The novel effort to portray pro-lifers as gangsters led to a long series of legal challenges and maneuvers, and the case has come up before the Supreme Court on three separate occasions.

In 2003 the Court ruled that a nationwide injunction against the Pro-Life Action League, granted in 1998, should be voided. But the pro-abortion plaintiffs went back to court yet again, bringing the case before the Supreme Court for the third time.

Justice Stephen Breyer, writing today's unanimous decision for the High Court, observed that pro-life demonstrations could not be seen as "a freestanding violence offense" under the terms of the RICO law. He observed that Congress had made a special effort to address blockades at abortion clinics with the Freedom of Access of Clinic Entances (FACE) law of 1994.

"Naturally I am gratified to be vindicated once again by the United States Supreme Court," said Joe Scheidler, the director of the Pro-Life Action League and defendant in the case. "I am mystified that I had to go to the trouble and expense of appearing before the Supreme Court three times."

Newly appointed Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito did not participate in the decision announced today.

© Copyright 2006 Domus Enterprises. All rights reserved.

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A Review of Munich by Against the Grain

Funny how some things just seem to happen in a timely manner, isn't it? In yesterday's mail, I finally got the DVD that I had been waiting for, and watched it immediately. Today, I am getting around to reading some of the blogs that I had not gotten to in awhile, and I find... same topic as my DVD!

CatholicsFriendsofIsrael has directed readers to a very long, very good review of MUNICH. A lot of time was spent on this review, and the author approaches the movie from both sides of the discussion. Against the Grain's Christopher has also seen the movie and gives his own thoughts on it also.

To be honest, I have to read this a few times before I can fully digest it and reach my own conclusion about what he is saying simply because it IS so long and there is so much to take in.
Having just watched ONE DAY IN SEPTEMBER twice, having read the book Striking Back, and also Vengeance, I will have to take this a little at a time.

I still will not be seeing Munich in a theatre. It is not worth the money to me. When I can borrow a DVD or rent one, I will take the time to view it. But until then, it is not on my list of things to see.

Ben Stein ... still a timely message

Realizing that this is NOT Christmas, I still want to put this here, since it just came today. Now the version I GOT had a whole lot added to it, including quotes from Billy Graham's daughter and 'Funny hows' that are typically added to emails to 'guilt' you into passing them on...

I think Ben Stein gets his point across very well without all that, and prefer his version.

Herewith at this happy time of year, a few confessions from my beating heart:

I have no freaking clue who Nick and Jessica are. I see them on the cover of People and Us constantly when I am buying my dog biscuits and kitty litter. I often ask the checkers at the grocery stores. They never know who Nick and Jessica are either. Who are they? Will it change my life if I know who they are and why they have broken up? Why are they so important? I don't know who Lindsay Lohan is, either, and I do not care at all about Tom Cruise's wife.

Am I going to be called before a Senate committee and asked if I am a subversive? Maybe, but I just have no clue who Nick and Jessica are. Is this what it means to be no longer young. It's not so bad.

Next confession: I am a Jew, and every single one of my ancestors was Jewish. And it does not bother me even a little bit when people call those beautiful lit up, bejeweled trees Christmas trees. I don't feel threatened. I don't feel discriminated against. That's what they are: Christmas trees. It doesn't bother me a bit when people say, "Merry Christmas" to me. I don't think they are slighting me or getting ready to put me in a ghetto. In fact, I kind of like it. It shows that we are all brothers and sisters celebrating this happy time of year. It doesn't bother me at all that there is a manger scene on display at a key intersection near my beach house in Malibu. If people want a creche, it's just as fine with me as is the Menorah a few hundred yards away.

I don't like getting pushed around for being a Jew and I don't think Christians like getting pushed around for being Christians. I think people who believe in God are sick and tired of getting pushed around, period. I have no idea where the concept came from that America is an explicitly atheist country. I can't find it in the Constitution and I don't like it being shoved down my throat.

Or maybe I can put it another way: where did the idea come from that we should worship Nick and Jessica and we aren't allowed to worship God as we understand Him?

I guess that's a sign that I'm getting old, too. But there are a lot of us who are wondering where Nick and Jessica came from and where the America we knew went to

Monday, February 27, 2006

The Unhealed Wound: The Damage of Divorce to Children

In looking for the Letter that Fr Rutler was referring to, I also found another that urged me on to find the source of HER Letter (entitled Triumph Over Divorce) to the Editor in the April 2003 Crisis Magazine.

While her letter admits "his tremendous witness to his children and grandchildren, and me through this article", she also immediately asks the question, calling it his "one critical error"... "Would Omicinski be as powerful an advocate for marriage if he hadn’t had such a painful childhood?"

The article itself is long and compelling. It is something that people today just do not like to hear, much like Elizabeth Marquardt's work. It is something therefore that draws all sorts of comments attempting to explain away the words that force us to take another look at what society accepts and justifies.

One of the TYPICAL answers is that those of us who have gone through the pain could not/would not be able to help others if we had not gone through it in the way we can because we did.

OK, it is VERY TRUE: "We know that in everything God works for good with those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28 RSV)

What bothers me is that people take this verse, and fly with it to excuse a myriads of Evil, and in the process do not hear or listen to what the person was SAYING.

God is quite capable of using any of us in any way without having to go through Divorce, Cancer, etc. He is quite capable of helping others to reconcile without putting our kids through the Hell of Divorce that this man describes. Why do we have to MINIMIZE what he is saying by using placebo words that do nothing to aid and comfort the afflicted?

Should we now encourage more to Divorce so that someday they can minister to others as they themselves have been ministered to?? (That is another Biblical verse often given to us to live by...)

Or should we call those comtemplating it to LISTEN and HEAR from those who are most affected, and PERHAPS give up the selfish persuit of personal happiness and self-fulfilment of the "I" and the 'soul mate" by reconciling and honoring the committment made with the Vows spoken?? Another verse often FORGOTTEN by those 'helping us' with placebo words... 1Cor 7:10-11"To the married I give charge, not I but the Lord, that the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, let her remain single or else be reconciled to her husband)"-- with the same applying to the husband....

The author has so much for people to HEAR, not just explain away that it saddens me that the ONLY RESPONSE this woman could give to him was essentially.... your pain doesn't count.

She may not agree with me. Many who want to justify no fault forced unilateral divorce and today's relative easy Nullity decrees do not want to hear this man's pain.

Divorce is evil, not good. Divorce hurts the kids. Divorce today, especially, because it is so easily justified, accepted, rationalized, even ENCOURAGED.... drowns out the voices of the children.

Well, those children are now becoming adults. And they ARE speaking out. And as I have said before... those of us who justified our actions had better begin to LISTEN.

Why continue to excuse and justify something that has such long-lasting effects on the ones we claim to love when Forgiveness and Love and Reconciliation are what God Himself calls us all to? I CHALLENGE you to read his words without trying to minimize what it is that he is saying! I challenge you to HEED his words as well.

YOUR 'wound' may 'heal' by choosing to abandon vows, etc... but this man's and so many other children of divorce have not.

From an email Diane Sollee had sent to me:

> Diane,
> I found it on aol music.
> Carolyn Jackson-King

Thank you Carolyn. I'm sitting here with tears streaming down my face. Powerful stuff. Mother in middle of fight with husband. Freeze frame and flashback to her own childhood. She takes the hand of "herself" as a little girl and together they watch scenes of her parents' marriage falling apart. Feels like it's music to illustrate Marquardt's "Between Two Worlds". I think it deserves a Smart Marriages Impact Award. It looks like it was released in 2004. Wish someone had brought it to our attention earlier, but it's never too late. Lyrics below. The "you" in "because of you" are her parents that divorced. - diane

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Oh, that Fr Rutler.....

A friend of mine sent this to me tonight, and I found it printed online in the original.

I am still laughing!

Spare the Meat, Spoil the Gospel

I was delighted to read the Manichaean ramblings of Daniel Paden, director of the Catholic Vegetarian Society (“Letters,” June 2003). It confirmed my theory that fanaticism in Western society alternates between nudism and vegetarianism, both of which contradict the order of grace.

As an optimist, I happily trust that Paden confines his extreme commitments to vegetarianism. Taste is one thing; it is another thing to condemn meat-eating as “evil” and permissible only “in rare and unfortunate circumstances.” Paden disagrees with no less an authority than God who forbids us to call any edible unworthy (Mark 7:18-19), and who enjoined St. Peter to eat pork chops and lobster in one of my favorite revelations (Acts 10:9-16). Does the Catholic Vegetarian Society think that Our Lord was wrong to have served up fish to the 5,000, or should He have refrained from eating the Passover lamb? When He rose from the dead and appeared in the Upper Room, He did not ask for a bowl of Cheerios, nor did He whip up a meatless omelette on the shore of Galilee.

Man was made to eat flesh (Genesis 1:26-31; 9:1-6), with the exception of human flesh. I stand on record against cannibalism, whether it be inflicted upon the Mbuti Pygmies by the Congolese Army or on larger people by a maniac in Milwaukee. But I am also grateful that the benevolent father in the parable did not welcome his prodigal son home with a bowl of radishes.

Vegetarians assume an unedifying posture of detachment from the sufferings of vegetables that are mashed, stewed, diced, and shredded. In expensive restaurants cherries are publicly burned in brandy to the applause of diners. It is not uncommon for people to submerge olives in iced gin and twist the peels of lemons. Be indignant, vegetarian, but not so selectively indignant that the bleat of the lamb and the plaintive moo of the cow drown out the whine of our brother the bean and the quiet sigh of the cauliflower. Vegetables have reactive impulses. Were we to confine our diet to creatures that lack sense and do not even respond to light, we could only eat liturgists and liberal Democrats.

Rev. George W. Rutler
New York City

Catholic Olympians

Googling can lead to interesting stories of heroes and heroes in the making.

I wondered if I could learn anything about Catholic Olympians and have found a few interesting stories and websites. While there is no real way of knowing simply by reading one or two pieces about an individual online about how they really live their Faith, there is an underlying thread that ran through those I found tonight.

What happens when they don't win?

Patrick Quinn, former speed skater turned Luge competitor had this to say in an interview with Catholic Explorer's Paul Storer: (Note, the hyperlinks are the same story, the second at original site).....

Reflecting on his life experiences, Quinn said that his reliance on the Catholic faith shaped his career journey. And, his spirituality also helped him cope with the devastating sports losses. “It’s easy to have faith when you’re winning,” he reasoned. When he looks into the eyes of wife, Kathleen, and young daughter, Alaina, he realizes that Olympic glory isn’t really important. He mentioned that he recently took the 2-year-old youngster snow sledding for the first time. Speaking about the shared joy and love of the afternoon outing, he concluded, “I think that was my Olympics.”

Derek Parra, 2002 Olympic gold and silver medalist in men's speedskating

Parra said that “After the Olympics, I had a chance to reflect on all that had happened to me. I tell kids to have belief in themselves. I’m a 33-year-old roller-skater — I can make my dream come true. No matter what, your dream can come true. Believe in yourself. Have faith that God will put you on a path. Before, I was just a guy going around in circles.”

I personally will be adding him to my prayers ....

Battling the emotional stress of divorce and advancing age, Parra finished 19th in the men's 1,500 speed-skating event at Oval Lingotto Tuesday afternoon. His time was 1:48.54, well off the winning pace set by Italy's Enrico Fabris (1:45.97).

"Today I was 19th. Four years ago, I was first," he said. "But I raced the same, with all my heart, with everything I had.

"The most important thing for me was keeping my dignity and character on the way down, not being a poor sport, trying to go down the way I came up, with respect and character. I did the best I could."

Rebecca Dussault, a U.S. cross-country skier from Colorado

"My faith comes first," said Dussault. "Then I'm a family woman. Then I'm an athlete. That's how I find balance."

In another interview with Carol Glatz of Catholic News Service:

Dussault said that after all her races her son always asks her, "Did you win?" In the United States, she almost always won and he'd reply, smiling, "Good job, Mommy."

"But here (at the Olympics) when he asks 'Did you win' and I say 'No, I got 48th,' he still sees that I am still the same person" and that defeat has not shattered her world.

She said this attitude makes her a valuable role model for her son, to see that no matter what, "I still have faith, love and I still try."

Rebecca has a website here that has now been diverted to a newer site for her Olympic run.
That second site directs us to this website. The recurring thread that runs in interviews and her website IS that Faith, Family, and THEN sports are her priorities. She also has a devotion to a man who lived in Turin long ago, serving the poor of the region, dying at the age of 25,
Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati, born in Turin in 1901 and beatified by Pope John Paul II May 20, 1990.

And who is this Pier Giorgio Frassati?

A young man who any parent would be proud to call their own, who surprised both of his parents by those who came to mourn him after his untimely death, because they had no idea of how many lives he had touched, or how. A man whose live can be emulated by anyone who chooses love over self.

God bless you!

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Ilan Halimi ..... May He Rest In Peace

With Issue first brought the death of Ilan Halimi to my attention the other day. At first, I heard not much about him on the news. Later, the news caught up to the bloggers, again.

I read a few places, but did not have a lot of time, so will make up for it now.

I went to Smooth Stone last night and found that those responsible had been captured, and that the leader of that gang Youssef Fofana had also been captured on the Ivory Coast.

Today, I returned to Janjan's With Issue and found that Someguy had put a link to another story in her comment box on Ilan. Tel-Chai Nation has posted more proof that the French police knew that this was happening simply because Ilan was Jewish.

What this poor 23 year old young man went through before he died can be found in the links provided in many of these blogger's linked news stories. Suffice it to say, it was horrendous. That the French police did not find him sooner, and that they denied that this was anti-Semitism is bad enough, but according to the article quoted on Tel-Chai Nation by Avi Green, even Israel has deserted this young man by saying little about it other than to convey condolences!

This Ilan is the same age as my son. I cannot (and never want to experience) imagine the pain of his family. I cannot understand the HATRED that can cause any human being to do this to another human being. We have men killing their wives and children, women killing their children, people killing while robbing someone, and it is getting worse all the time. But to kill someone you don't even know SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY ARE JEWISH (or Catholic, or Black or... you add your own....) is beyond my understanding. To torture another human being until they die or are near death?

Those who do not know History are doomed to repeat it....You would think that FRANCE and the other nations over in Europe would REMEMBER history.

Ah, but then we have people like the Iranian President (and others of his ilk over there... nations, not just individuals...) who deny the Holocaust ever took place. Where 11 million people died (Catholics and other Christians, Gypsies, the handicapped in the T4 Program, etc) and 6 million of them were Jews, as part of the 'Final Solution' to the 'Jewish Problem'.

But you see, the Grand Mufti of Jerusalem was also a Nazi, and he continued to spread his hatred... a distant relative of Arafat, who looked up to the Mufti as a hero... and so many others that have been taught this hatred for 60 more years...

But it isn't JUST the Grand Mufti and his followers who denies the Holocaust took place.

Smooth Stone also had two more posts of interest to me on that topic! Holocaust Denier David Irving has been sentenced in Austria to three years in prison, even though now he says he has seen the light.....and there are more stories about it here.

Irving claimed it was not Nazis who burned synagogues and killed Jews on Kristallnacht (the Night of Broken Glass) in 1938 but agitators dressed up as them. He claimed the Holocaust never happened. Despite evidence dating back to the end of the war in 1945, he told the judge it was only after 1991, when he had access to the papers of the former deputy commander of Auschwitz and of the Nazi logistician Adolf Eichmann, that he came to believe in the Nazi programme.

"Naturally I apologise," he said. "I'm not a Holocaust denier. Obviously, I've changed my views. I spoke then about Auschwitz and gas chambers based on my knowledge at the time, but by 1991 when I came across the Eichmann papers, I wasn't saying that any more and I wouldn't say that now. The Nazis did murder millions of Jews."

Right, he stopped believing that in 1991. But then he sued Deborah Lipstadt for libel in 2000 and lost the case!

She points out:

"The true uniqueness of the Holocaust starts only after 1941, with the Nazi implementation of a systematic plan of murder. No other example exists of a modern government using all its forces (including post offices, banks, army, etc.) to annihilate an entire people: men, women, and children. This genocide occurred inside and outside Germany's borders.

"It is not the industrial and technological elements of the Holocaust which make it unique. If the Germans hadn't created the gas chambers, they would have continued to kill people en masse like the Einsatzgruppen did. They probably would have murdered far fewer people in four years. However, sometimes, by focusing on the significance of the gas chambers, we downplay the brutality and incredible horror, as well as the organizational aspects, of the Einsatzgruppen murders.

This article ends:

The Meaning for Israel

Many motifs which Lipstadt has analyzed in the deniers' publications on the Shoah return nowadays in a wider context vis-a-vis Israel. "There are people who say, 'I don't think there should be a state of Israel or any Jews in the Middle East, because they do not belong there.' By pulling the argument to one extreme, other extremists suddenly sound more reasonable. For instance, there are those who say, 'I am against the State of Israel but the Jews can live peacefully in a democratic Palestinian state.' Destroying the Jewish character of the state suddenly seems far more moderate than wanting the total expulsion of the Jews."

Lipstadt agrees that criticism against Israel is as legitimate as that against any other country; but she stresses the difficulty of sharply defining proper boundaries: "What is not permitted," she concludes, "is false historical analysis and the use of immoral equivalencies. One cannot compare the 2002 Jenin battle to the Shoah. Such a comparison shows either ignorance of history or misguided intentions."

Lipstadt sees this comparison as a new expression of denial. "When one speaks about Israeli soldiers as Nazis, that is a denial of what Israeli soldiers are and what the Nazis were. This is a misuse of history for political purposes. One may not like Israel, but that is different from lying about history in a court. Much current criticism of Israel is based on anti-Semitism and denial. Some of the exaggerated talk about Israeli power, Israeli strength and Israeli ability is very similar to what one has seen for decades in the writings of the Holocaust deniers and, before that, in those of the Nazis and other anti-Semites."

OH, and there was one more post I found on Smooth Stone!

You do realize that the same people who hate the Jews also hate the USA? You do realize that we are in a War? One that was declared on us long before 9/11? One that we MUST win? It is not just France that must come out of denial!

God bless!

To the family of Ilan Halimi:
My sincere condolences.

The LORD bless you and keep you:
The LORD make his face to shine upon you, and be gracious to you:
The LORD lift up his countenance upon you, and give you peace.
~~Numbers 6:24-26

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Sunday, February 26, 2006


Air Force Wife has a new adornment that I am JEALOUS of... or is the word envious?

On Heroes and Cads....

The Church Militant has examples of two heroic men (more, in reality... see his posts), and one... not even fit to be their doormat:

Here, he speaks of Cardinal Kung (for more information on the Cardinal, go here)

Here, he has mentioned two men, one a Hero, one a Cad.
Actually, there is a second hero IMHO in the 'Cad story'...a student named Paul Trost, 20.

Lt. Col. Gregory "Pappy" Boyington and four other graduates of University of Washington with their Medal of Honor Citations are listed (three of whom were awarded posthumously this high honor) in another post here. He continues his coverage of the Univ of Washington (I cannot write UW... to me it means Madison... but that is another story altogether...)

He takes a slight swing at another ... uhm, guy to be admired (NOT) from another University out in Denver along the way to the Cad....